All Aboard the Struggle Bus

                Jack White:        

            I became a fan of Jack White after seeing the documentary It Might Get Loud. Jack White is most famous for being the creative force behind The White Stripes and has been a talented musician in other bands post-White-Stripes (including The Raconteurs, The Dead Weather, and his solo career). So, in this documentary, Jack White talks about how he prefers playing imperfect guitars. Guitars that are really old or plastic or have bent necks or get out of tune easily. He says that he prefers these instruments because he wants his performances to be a struggle. He likes the challenge of having to conquer a difficult instrument on stage live. That is one of the reasons why I like Jack White. 

Seen here playing a guitar made of cardboard

I like his willingness to take on a challenge. I like that he knows that live performances aren’t easy and he wants to add an element of difficulty to that uneasiness. I like that he wants to grow as a musician. That kind of attitude is something that I have wanted to adapt in to my life. This kind of attitude towards struggling is especially applicable to living a Christian life that calls myself and everyone else to grow closer to God.

My Current Struggle Bus:

I accepted the fact that joining Reach Youth Ministry was going to be a struggle. I knew that I was going to have to be incredibly frugal with my money, that I would be far away from family and friends, that I would have to learn how to turn strangers into friends (especially since I live with those strangers). I did not, however, fully understand what true struggles were in store for me. I did not know what it was going to be like living in community and having to be constantly in the presence of a team of young adults. I did not know what it was going to be like trying to share my faith with groups of kids and teens who have small attention spans and little interest in what I’m saying to them. I did not know what it was going to be like traveling to communities with a large Hispanic or Native American culture and how different it can be from my own upbringing. Most days are really awesome but every now and again I find myself riding the struggle bus.

Good news is that tickets to board the struggle bus are free

This past week my team and I led retreats in Pasco, WA. Pasco is part of what is called the Tri-Cities in Washington. It has the most families living in low income out of the three cities and it has a large Hispanic population.

 

Notice Pasco is literally on the other side of the tracks, or in this case the river

We did short day retreats for kids at the Catholic school, St. Patrick’s. It was difficult to keep the younger kids quiet and focused while the older kids just wanted to chill and do nothing cause they were not in class. Youth group nights were a different challenge. I’m a strange white nerd from the suburbs of Missouri trying to connect with basketball savvy, Spanish fluent, hip-hop listening, reserved teens. So, in youth group with the high school, none of the guys were really interested in talking in small group cause I hadn’t done anything to win them over and at middle school youth group there were ~20 fully energized 7^th grade boys in small group because there’s over 100 kids there that night and there was no way of sitting all of them down to talk to them.

Holy Struggles:

Many of the saints of the Catholic Church are incredible models of enduring struggles. St. Paul (you know, the guy who wrote letters that make up part of the New Testament) would walk in to town and attacked by thrown stones until he either was knocked unconscious or walked out of town. St. Rose Philippine Duchesne was a French nun who taught and evangelized to Native Americans in the Missouri and Kansas wilderness.

Side Note: Her shrine/ burial site is in my hometown.

She could not understand the tribal language, was poorly financed, and dealt with the many illnesses that come from surviving in the wild. St. Thomas More had a political feud with King Henry VIII and his supporters before finally being beheaded. All of the martyrs, whether priests or young virgins, had to endure painful deaths because they were unwilling to renounce their faith in God. 

Let's not forget the ultimate model of facing struggles. Jesus Christ was betrayed by Judas and Peter, abandoned by the other apostles, was scourged by Roman soldiers, had a crown of thorns shoved onto his head, carried a cross up to Golgotha while many of the Jews jeered him and the Romans pushed him forward, had nails hammered through his hands, and died on the cross. Yet, Jesus willingly endured the pain, forgave the people responsible for his crucifixion, and brought salvation to the world because he loves us.

                 The Goodness of Struggling:  

             Through all of this, I come to understand that struggling is good. Struggles help me grow as a man, as a teammate, as a Catholic. How would I know how to relate to teens and evangelize to them if I didn't endure the awkward, silent moments? How would I deliver a solid performance in theatre if I didn't make mistakes in the rehearsal process? How would I know how to love my team if I didn't experience days when our emotions make it hard to like each other? How could I follow Jesus and the saints that have come before me if I did not live through a trial of suffering like they did?

            There is a sense of nervousness I feel before a retreat and a sense of relief that I feel afterward. That is because a part of me anticipates that I will face some sort of struggle during a retreat, that I will blank during my talks or not be able to handle the teens during small group time. Then when the retreat is over I remember the experience of witnessing one or multiple kids come alive during a retreat, where they grow closer to God during the weekend. I remember the fun of playing sports with the guys and their curiosity about how I got to be where I'm at now. It's a good feeling at the end of a difficult retreat because I know that the hard work is worth it, that God plants seeds of faith in those moments of struggle.